I FUCKING HATE RUDE PEOPLE

if theres ONE thing i hate more than tardy people its fucking rude people. and rude people who tell ME i'm rude?? holy hell thats asking for a gunt punch. So yes thats exactly what happened to me today. 15 mintues before closing i got told off by the fucking rudest lady ever. What a way to ruin my day. So, for all you unbelievers i will tell you the story from the start. At 8 35PM (25 minutes before the end of my shift) these 2 ladies come in (beheamoths is more correct probably) and it was starting to get busy again and it was only *only* ricardo taking tables. So i sat them at the nice clean table 13, and they sit down and look around and point to the ONLY dirty table in the restaurant and say *we want to sit there* And, so i look at the table (any other hostess, and they would have told them it was dirty and to take the table they were sitting at now) but anyways so i looked at the table and said *i have 2 clean it up so it'll be a couple minutes okay* and at that time another couple walked in and obviosly i'm going to seat them first before i go and clean up a table for another couple who *already* have a seat. So tral lala i seat them then i go 2 clean up the dirty table and then i tell them their tables ready. SOOOO they sit down. and then ricardo, who has like....4 new tables in a row comes up 2 ask me what new tables he has, and so i tell him, table3, table 23, and table 2 (the beheamoths) and i said go to table 3 first because they'be been here for awhile. and he does, then he goes to 23. and so five, MAYBE ten mintues pass and table 2 comes up. I'm heading for the phone because its ringing and the old nasty hag goes *we're leaving now. Other tables have been served before us and your service is just horrible* and so i'm in a littel shock cuz what am i supposed 2 say, you can't yell at customers obviously so i'm like *oh...um...okay* (seriously what do you say to them?) and then the lady give me THE dirties look ever and snaps *yeah, like you even care* and zooms out the door. FUCK ME i almost spat in her face, had she sad that to my face and not while zipping out the door like a pussy. So then i'm like *calm down corinna, deep breaths* and THEN she comes back in and is like *i want to see your manager* and so i'm like *okay just hold on* and i think *good, you can complain all you want to the manager because A) i'm an honest worker, B) i dont lie, i can't get in that much trouble. So i go 2 my boss and tell him what happened* and hes like *ayaaa, i dont want 2 talk 2 them right now because they are really angry, give them business card and call look for me 2morrow* So i go outside and i'm surprised i'm not hemmroaging in the brain yet. and so i say to her (still pretty politely i'd say) *my managers not in right now (getting a business card) but i'll write down his name and you ca....* *YES thats right you do that because hes going to get an earful about your (keyword YOUR) horrible service* And at this point in time i dont even know what shes doing still alive and thati haven't knocked her out yet. BUT i'm still trying 2 make an apology or something so i say soemthing like *we only have the one server working right now and hes got more than just one table*. yeah i didn't even get half that sentence out. it was pretty much *we have one s-* and the old bag goes *write your name too so i can tell your boss about your service*..... after that i just didnt' give a fuck i wrote my name down and walked away. I wasn't scared or anything cuz i dont get scared when i know i'm not wrong. and honestly...service? WHAT SERVICE, i'm not your fucking waiter, i'm your hostess, i sat you for at most TEN minutes. I cleaned up your table and took you to it. 10 bucks say half the other hostess would've been gone by that time. What the fuck did i do to you that results in you pointing at me and complaining at me and giving me that *as if you care* line. FUCK FUCK FUCK. You know that i'm seriously pissed off when the head sushi chef (who doesn't care about anything) askes me if i'm okay. Its been like 2 hours and i'm still super pissed off. If i hadn't been still on shift, and if I was seriously any meaner i woulda yelled back at her. In fact it got me even more pissed off after the fact tath she left is that i took it. GAAAAAAAAAAWD. If her impatient saggy ass had waited like 2 more minutes me or jen would have went 2 take her order but NOOOOOOO i need food now to feed my cellulite. FUCK ME, man i cant believe she ruined my day. AAAAAAAARG. customer is always right my ass. Like honestly in the past, no matter how wrong the customer was, i always clenched my teeth and apologized. But today i coudln't do it, i could NOT bring myself to apologize because that lady was SO. FUCKING. IMPATIENT. Most of the time i could see reasons as to why a customer would complain. BUT THIS WAS ABSURD. My waiters not fucking superman here jesus jones. aaaargh. after that i called up my friend while going to save ons and like yelled my lungs out. And i was holding a 4L jug of milk at the deli and i was like *FUCK IRIS I JUST WANNA HIT SOMEONE IN THE HEAD WITH THIS* and the man standing next 2 me backed away. aaaah rage is funny soetimes

New York Here I come Baby

ho hooo, so yup, i'm going to NY in february. whoo aaaah. so exciting. But i'm a bit scared that i will get scammed. I got a few info sheets today and one full sheet was about the dangers of new york. hahaha... maaaan. Welp, last week went by purdy fast. Jess and her mom came out on friday. And then i went to see Swan Lake on tuesday with iris, ling and tara. um.... I forget whatelse. But it certainly was a productive weekend. Erg, theres supposed to be soemthing really important i wanted to say but its completely left my mind. ho hum. Classes are coming along nicely i guess (except accounting) yes even econ is okay. Or at least the homework is coming along....*okay* I haven't even cracked a peek at the acctg text yet. Its going to be like psych all over again. My design instructor appears to be ignoring me. It makes me sad. hahaha its okay. Em, mandarin class is going into character writing this class. everyone congratulate me for not dying in the first week since all we did was say ju, qu, xu. Everyone appears to be quitting now. At YC, my brother told me the bimbo quit (prolly cuz they call her a bimbo) and so did a long time waitress. At kyoto, 2 of the waitress' gave their 2 weeks notice. but aside from that thursday was a fun day. Ricardo doesn't think i'm an idiot anymore! hahaha success. me jenn and him were reading the sex advice column in the SEE paper. aaaaah. (Tell me, what are the no no's of going to have sex with an internet 'friend' who tells you to meet them in their dark apartment room, asks you to take off all your clothes and comes into the room w/ a towel covering their head?) Ah its all good. haha. Today i made a trek around the south part of etown, picking up all my moms beauty needs. (sometimes i'm glad i'm butch and don't spend millions of dollars on skincare products) Oh right, just had to voice this. But on tuesday (ballet day) irish was....yes ladies and gentlemen late once again. I told her to come pick me up at six FOURTY FIVE at work (ballet started at 8 but i still wanted 2 go home and drop off my bookbags and stuff and fix my hair or something) well anyhoo thank goodness it wasn't busy. 6 45 rolled around....nada. 5 minutes later i called iris and her mom picked up her cell saying that she *just left* JUST LEFT? good gawd, and she still has 2 traverse down that huge flight of steps, take the train to corona, and walk down jasper. man i was soooo angry. so anyways at 7 10, her sister calls me (cuz i called her like 20 times) and i was like "where are you guy's?" *we're at your place* and i was like (smack head) so i ran home and i was like *DIDN'T I SAY 6 45 AT WORK* (i think this is the first time i've ever scolded iris before) so anyways i went into my apartment and frolicked around for maybe 10 mintues and i was like *aaargh so late, so hot* and she goes *we still have 45 mintues you know* ugh. I dunno why i didn't say this then, prolly cuz i was in rage but still. I DONT CARE HOW MUCH TIME WE HAVE LEFT, ITS THE FACT THAT I TOLD YOU TO MEET ME AT A CERTAIN TIME AND ONCE AGAIN YOU WERE LATE. one of these days iris, i tell you, your tardiness will get the best of you. i mean i wouldn't care if you were late once in awhile cuz nobody's on time everytime, but i've never seen someone be late every single time practically. Oh, and then tara got angry at iris because *we* made her wait at the jubilee for 15 minutes (coincedentially 6 45 to 7 00 is 15 minutes....) and then iris and tara started yelling at each other. huuuuh. but that was last week. Oy today this bitch lady closed the elevator door on a guy. Seriously if she wasn't yacking on the phone like an ape and a FUCKIN IDIOT she seriously should have heard the guy buzz himself in let alone start walking into the elevator. No need for those jabby fingers of yours to push the *close door button* like your going to die. and after he started to slowly get crushed by door she didn't make any movement to open up the door again. I shoulda smacked her eh? hahah naw i wouldn't, but the thought had dawned on me. Cathy told me i've gotten a lot meaner. Which if i think about it, is true. hahah she's lucky that i didn't yell at her for saying that cuz i was tempted to. hahaha. I dunno what changed but I dont seem to get suckered into doing stuff i dont want to anymore. Like last year it'd be like *corinna gimme 50 bucks and jump into this pool of spiders* and i'd be like.....*sigh...okay* Now i'm like *screw that shit*. and i guess thats why cathy thinks i'm mean, because i dont follow her to do pointless things anymore. BOY this blog sure has changed. Its like a dish up the dirt blog now. hahah i'm horrible...HORRIBLE I TELL YA. but. i gotta go now. buy some groceries 2morrow. later everyboby

quickie tonight

no you horn dog not that kinda quickie....although....*evil snicker* hahaha jkjk.
I'm supposed 2 be in bed, because once again i have a super long day tomorrow.... sigh. straight 2 school then straight to work.... So i guess all my classes seem pretty okay. cept the 2 on TR are super boring, super long, and super....boring.... its so hard, and im always restless in there too... le sigh....but aside from that my other 2 classes on MW are good. china 101 is really boring right now (ju chu fu, ma ma ma....) haha but i think i will look forward to it. my design class is pretty okay too.... cept its really big.... but aside from that a lot of the girls are really friendly. and....ohohoho ... haha you guys are gonna call me a sick bastard for this one, but my instructor certainly is....*nice* hohoh... hahah. but if you think about it, that is a bad thing. because, i will be to distracted by his boyish good looks...hahahah so corny. so in fact. no my instructor is not good looking, not at all.... and the fact that hes like 24,25ish? no thats a complete turn off, yeah man, horrible. hes like an old old man. Just another instructor... yup. hahah. Oh we got a new *waiter* at kyoto. hahah I'm like deathy scared of him. Hes around the age of everyone else (but hes got a kid). And i'm like super scared of him cuz i can never tell if hes joking or not. hahah well i guess not scared, but like when he jokes w/ me or vice versa, we stare at each other for a couple seconds until the joker cracks a smile then we realize its a joke and laugh. haha but by that time its not very funny hahahaha. aaaah its all good though. Welp aside from all that fun fun, jess is coming out friday. Shes going to stay at some unknown friends house. Am i a bad cousin? aaah dunno. Me and cathy stayed up super late on monday night gossiping. haha its super bad, but i told her about my super friend craig. Whos craig you ask? Boy you must be new here, if you read any of my previous blogs you'd know....oh yes, you'd know. Buuuuut, cathy tells me to go and find him because she likes the sound of him. HAR i dont think she realizes how hard of a task that his. But aside from that cathy told me that the art students are going to NY this year. whoohohooo i want to go. but, i forget how much she said it was. ho hum...what else....oh i did bad on my econ hw....hahah the shame.... i think i was tryign to do it to fast... hahahaha....oops.... i have so many math-y courses this year. i guess that means i have 2 get some new batteries for my calculator...hehe. i took 2 of them out for my mp3 player... dagnab it. oy so late... hah one last thing. in design class we were drawing *isometric* drawings today and DAMN it made my head hurt hahah certain ones did anyways. i swore that very last one made my brain hemorage. hahaha. but alas i must bid thee adieu. later peoples

boo school

Have i ever mentioned to anyone before that i hate school? Le sigh. But oh on the plus side i got into a art class! whoo yay. It really would've sucked considering that i'm an art student and aren't taking any art classes. So yup, i'm taking, Accounting 300, Economics 101, China 101, and Des 370. I hope i like des 370 more than i liked des 390. whoooo ee. I really should be doing my homework right now, but i'm looking on the internet for who i want to cosplay as next year for animethon. I have decided to be for shure at least one of the following two guys. Either Reno the red head from FFVII, or ANBU Kakashi from Naruto. I think i'm leaning more towards kakashi because....well his costume looks more fun, and i'll say unique for now, since i have a hard time finding ppl who cosplayed as him. Reno's costume is really simple and i guess hes kinda old and *technically* not anime. I guess i COULD be both of them. But that would mean that my Miwako costume im 75% done would go to waste....oh the choices the choices. I need my sketchbook back from cathy. I want to make some sketches and plan the costumes out. haha i'm a geek. But alas, i think....no i MUST get started on that econ hw. Its due sunday....oh the shame the shame....i have to read too i think....

picabo hath returned

Soooo i'm back in Edmonton now. yeaaaaah. Each city has their own pluses. Schoolio starts next week and yeah baby i'm totally looking forward to that....haha yeah right. Eem, but ooh ooh theres a lot of stuff i want to do in town now. I'll make note of them here so i dont forget. FIRST of all theres that ghost tour. oh yeah baby that sounds fun. Its run by the same ppl who do pub crawls so we get to ride in a double decker bus and tour edmontons haunted places. hohohoooo. I also heard about this band thats relly good that will be playing at New City, i dunno how old you have to be but if its all ages perchance i will ask jess to go with me cuz she'll be in town. Oh and i want to go to that tatoo festival, though not as much as when i first read about it because i need to save money....yeaaaah. Um. oh and me ling and iris will be going to see ballet again. whoooo yeaaaah. thats cool. haha we're going to see Swan Lake. Ballet is fun to watch shaaadup. Har har, i want to go to WEM. i think i need some new clothes....or at least new pants.... yeah. aaaah maaan i want sushi. I WANT A FORT MCMURRAY MAKI DAMMIT. aaaand i need a hair cut.... hoho. my neuro net processor is making funny noises. but yeaaah i'm going to go back outside and molt. bah humbug. Oh wait, i had a dream, hahah i dreamt i was working at the restaurant and sum 41 came in (hah, this is the 2nd time i dreamt sum 41 came to work) how bizaare

Oh Poop

I'm saaaad, I went to my friends birthday party today and all her friends had boyfriends....and they look really happy and cuddly together.... booo urns. Soooo, i'm back in the mac, workin at the restaurant. I'll be here till the end of august at least doing the same ol same ol. I'm kinda creeped out mitch will see me cuz liek...yeah....its mitch.... I hope i dont have a summer fling again. Note to self, dont have a summer fling. But it was nice seeing the gang again. And i'm being honest this time. I think from last time i've changed alot so its all good. I'm not that quiet dupeable girl they used to know....or at least i dont look like one anymore. Hahah. but Beths boyfriend is really purdy... hahah i'm going to hell but totally, yeah. He listens to like EXACTLY the same music i listen too. hahah its cool. I am so lonely..... does anyone even read this? hahah. Soooo I seen sterling today, and hes like all beefed up, (and honestly its kinda creepy). And Kat's boyfriend is the same, and Kat's the same, and Beths' the same. The only ones who really changed i'd say are Sterling and Quinton. Though actually not really just that i used to never talk to quinton. He's pretty friendly so its all good. I woulda liked to have seen josh again cuz hes allways funny. I like talking 2 quinton hes easy to talk to. Drew really scares me cuz he looks really like....tight.... Beths bf on the other hand...hahahah jkjk. but he looks really nice, and (just based on my first looks judgment) i think me and him'd get along pretty well.... aside from all that sporty poker stuff.... but yeaaah. I assume thats the last that i'll see of them till next year. hahah. WELP i think thats all. I'm gonna go now.

Tra lalaaa

Last day of art class today.... le sigh. I actually really like this summer class, it was pretty fun. I'm bery sad that i wont get to see the purdy man anymore. Yeaaaah he gets really angry really easy but hes pretty pretty. Boo urns, i'm so jealous that he bought Christine so many drinks.... Poooh why'd christine have to tell me that. I wanted to go to but, like yeaah i didn't want to go by myself. Sooo i went and watched the Skeleton Key with Elaine today. It was pretty good i guess. And i've got a fucker of a sore throat. Poooh how come i dont have a boyfriend..... I think that the best place to meet a guy would be at work. No i dont mean dating a co worker cuz i think that'd be awkward. But like, if i was working and one of my customers hit on me, or waited for me after work. I think that'd be sweet. How come i dont attract anyone but creepy ppl. siiigh. Well Jess came out and is not safely back in fort mac. She said sounds of the underground was great and she met a new guy friend. Ah but i really should go to sleep, my eyes are slowly rolling 2 the back of my head.... aaah.... goood night

mmm....formaldehyde

I went 2 the anatomy lab today to draw cadaver parts...boy did i almost pass out.... haha i think i'm turning soft man...wut the hell is wrong with me. I didn't grow up getting power slammed and DDT'ed by my 2 brothers for nothing... erg arg. Does anyone like the feeling they get when the open their mail box and see letters addressed to them? I sure to. I bought like.... a crap load of stuff off ebay this past week just so i can get some stuff in the mail....*sigh* so sad....
har har, I'm such a loner in my art class, Everbody has a friend they know from somewhere else except me. Boo urns. huuur, so i was describing 2 my cousin the 3 guys in my art class and its funny, cuz they're like... opposites almost. One guy is like...kinda bulky and piercing-y w/ spiky hair, the other guy is tall and skinny and like....reminds me of a rugged model man, and the other guy is kinda short and tan and like a stunt bike-y guy. One of them thinks i'm stalking him i think. I've seen him 2 times in the past 3 days. First time i seen him while i was rounding a corner 2 go 2 work. And the 2nd time was during the bomb scare (yes i said bomb scare) at work on sunday. The sad thing is, he was in uniform so then its like *oh okay he works there its okay* But me being a hostess I dont get a uniform so i'm basically in normal clothes, sitting there watching...hahah.... daaaw. The bomb scare was kinda funny in a way. A customer demanded he get his change back and wouldn't leave the building till he got his change, another girl took like...a handfull of tempura and put it in her pocket, and didn't end up coming back. The other funny thing i thought was, there was this police man across the street and from my position it looked like he was carrying a cardboard box towards us and i was like *...uh....is that the bomb....if it is sholdnt he be taking it the other way.....* hahaha....but it was the caution tape thing...eh hehehe.....
welp, my cousin is coming out on monday....good gawd, finally someone to go out with. Knowing the luck i have i'll get non stop HW hahaha. k days is coming up too. i hope i remember 2 get a ticket thing for my cousin 2morrow or booooy will she be angry with me... hohoho....welp i think thats enough blabber for today. buh bye ah-vree-bah-day

Bye lil' devil

har thats the first time anyone has ever said that to me. hahah i feel so special. Soooo my life these past few weeks has been completely repetititve. With all my getting up and schooling and sleeping and working... i can plan ahead like 4 weeks in advance practically. i'm so lonely. boo hoo... This hot guy came in to eat today and he winked at me. ohhohoho. me like that. hahah oh my summer art class is going okay too. cept that i'm a big loner, but its still pretty good. theres 3 hot guys in there (cept cathy says they're all not hot) hahaha em.... my brother was a rebel today and stole 2 pairs of socks.. hahah. aaaaah. did i mention i'm lonely? hmm...well i seem 2 have forgotten what i was going to tell everybody..... there was a lot too....jesus jones. buuut i guess i'm gonna go sleep then....so sadly predictable. maybe tomorrow i will meet a pretty man :D yeaaaaaah

weird dreams

ho hum,
i've been having a lot of weird dreams recently. Last week, I dreamt i was a super villan. But it was pretty cool cuz i could fly, and everybody knows i love flying. I could also shoot like....bullets out of my fingers. I didn't plan on being a villian it was just that i kept on accidentally killing ppl. Like, the police were after me and i kept trying 2 fly away and they'd shoot at me and i'd dodge then like...natural reflex i'd shoot back and like they'd all get shot in the heads and stuff. And then the cops got angry and sent in their arnold swartzenegger of SWAT. and in came....emilio estavez....dont ask why. but he was in like total rambo gear and he tried to capture me but...i slipped through his fingers and eventually ran away from my family....and then i woke up...hahah it was cool cuz i could fly.
I just suddenly rememberd this dream, but ....me and a group of ppl got stranded on an island and it was like....gilligans island meets survivor. and....um i think the plane exploded or something and my friend fell to the sand and i ...flew...and was gonna go get him but the bad guys were near by so i uncontrollably flew myself backwards into the water. and then later on i found my friend and dragged him to our *secret* set up camp place that was nice and well ration stocked....then i dont remember the rest.
The dream i had today took me seriously by surprise cuz the night before i was looking at my friends grotesque book of diseases and i was scared i was going 2 dream of having like....everything. But anyways, this ones gonna be more detailed cuz i remember it more clearly....Sooo...i *think* i was either married to or had some kinda relationship with Justin (this guy i knew and kinda liked from highschool). And my *former* best friend Katherine and her long term BF Drew were there too. And we were in this room and then suddenly Justin like...i dont remember clearly but he like grabbed me and he had this pill in his hand and it was supposed to make me die. (Drew had one too). And obviously i was trying not to swallow the pill and like tears were coming out of my eyes cuz i couldn't believe Justin was doing this to me. But in the end he won and i swallowed the pill. And i started crying, and he held me and read me like....*the* most sweetest heart wrenching goodbye poem ever. And after that I didn't feel so bad about dying because ...iforget. So i like...snuggled into his lap and held onto him and closed my eyes. And then i *awoke* in this totally different room and Kat was there too (having just awoke from the death pill sleep). And Justin and Drew were no where to be seen, and when i asked Kat how Drew gave her her pill and what he said after she said *....idunno he just gave it to me and didn't do anything after* and then, i really awoke...hahah yeaaah the story was really rushed but after i woke up i felt really happy and sad. Hhaha i hope it doesnt mean i'm jealous. not to mention i haven't seen justin in like....2 years. hahah how bizarre

its a mad dash towards the finish line

no actually its a slow crawl. I feel like being very productive these past few weeks (however not productive as in house cleaning).... more as in making stuff. hmmm.. well i wanted to make (learn) to make sushi, and i did. and i also want to make dumplings, and mint mocha coffee drink, and finish my costume, and paint something, and plant a lot more stuff.... vroom vroom vrooom. buuuut alas i haven't. the afternoon hostess got fired by boss' wife yesterday. all the waitress and sushi chefs thought it was complete bullcrap cuz it wasn't even professional. uuugh. what else.... wellp it looks like i'll be staying out here till at least august.... yeaaah *le sigh* i wish i had a swimming pool....i think i'd go swimming ever day or something.... poooh. i think i'm gonna go to my piczo site and make one of those list things of things that i wanna do before i die. yeaaaaah. oh waht fun.
ps. haaaaappy fathers daaaaay o^-^o

whats new sports fans?

nothing really, cept the fact that i have a lot of new clothes and am short one pair of shoes....that dirty shoe stealing bastard. sooo my parents came in to town and spent the week out here, and my mom and i went shopping for clothes. and she spent 500$ on a hair cut....isn't that amazing? but also...SOME BASTARD STOLE MY SHOES.... that dirty son of a....i also dyed my hair today, i finally got the necessary goods to do it properly. so i'm a purple green head now.. hohoh. just like barney. hmm what else. oh my boss went out of town and so his wife is here looking out and BOY is she scary. the afternoon hostess got fired today. oy oy. but any hoo i'm gonna go sleep now....or actually i'll prolly go and finish up paper mario.. yahooo

I could have touched John Cena....

Never ceases to fail people. I corinna have THE most bad luck in the whole world. A while back ago i bought TWO sets of edmonton smackdown tickets, and i didn't know which ones would be the better seats. (row 8 seats 15&16 or row 11 seats 6&7). someone told me that 5&6 would be a lot closer to the ramp and i tried comfirming it with rexall place and ticketmaster, and they were about as helpfull as a tub of crap. So i took a random guess and decided 2 keep seats 6&7....i sold the other tix to this guy today with a red hat for 80$. I get to rexall palce today and there are like hordes of ppl trying to buy any type of tickets for like...100+ bucks and i was like...DAMMIT who told me no one would be here trying 2 buy last minute tixs????. and then i get into the areana and the lady seats us and we're like in the middle of nowhere practically. and like 20 mintues later BOOM red hat stands up in front of me and hes got like....THE best seat in the house. Right next to the ramp, in the corner on TV....i like sat down and cried almost. complete bullshit. So pissed off. ARG. what an unlucky person I am. i think i will now go and splurge money on expensive shoes....damn it

It'sa me MARIO!

har i lied i'm not mario. but i have been playing paper mario :) aaaah mario is so funny. Today was a day where if i were a meaner person i woulda knocked some teeth out. Customers who are asses deserve to eat food teethless i tell you. At work when its super busy, theres always that one dickface who refuses to take the table you offer them and instead request the single super dirty table in the far far corner. And when you want to leave, regardless of the fact that you are out of uniform purse in hand and sneakers on, everyone still waves you (not the waitress) down and requests you to refill their water, and when you refil their water they tell you to bring them napkins, and when you bring them napkins they tell you to bring them side plates. GAWD save some breath for the love of god say it all the first time....vreh. so yeah today was pretty shitty now that i think about it. but on the plus side i successfully made it to WEM and bought red bean popsicles :D yeaaaaah.hmm maybe i should eat one right now....wooo aaaah, so i booked off the next 3 days from work so i could go with my brother to the upcomming smackdown event on tuesday......yeaaah who likes john cena...hahaha. not to mention i can finally go shopping with out constantly worring about being late for work. have i told anyone lately that i've gona like shoe craving? it comes from my mom's genes i tell you. i have like....7 pairs of shoes i'm gunning down right now....sigh....i wish i were rich. HAHAHAHAH aaah ebay is fun. me and my friend are looking up jock straps on ebay. when your sad, it never ceased to fail. i wonder how much underwear models get paid....

aaaw-sum

no my loyal fans i havent disappeard off the face of the earth, i just took a extended leave of absense. I went back to my hometown of fort mac for mothers day and the rest of the week and it was funny cuz i seen like...20 classmates during the week. aaaaah. But aside from the boring week of work, i *earned* enough moolah from working to pay off summer school... oh boy hahaha. My daddy paid me in cash cuz i left before cheques were distributed so i was carrying around like 1000 bucks. AND THEN my mom gave me money, followed by gramma followed by my brother. so i was like asking to be mugged haha. I had 2 live by myself for 2 days and boooy do i hate it hahah so boring, and night time is creeeeepy. i like taped my eyes shut so they wouldn't play tricks on me. buuuut the main reason for this entry today is to comment on GREEN DAY! hohooo i went 2 their concert today and it was grood. yup yup. i actually managed to save enough oxygen to last the whole concert at the 2nd row. (not on top of a garbage can like sum 41) haha i was so pissed off, some guy decided to punch some other guy via my face and he like skimmed my jaw. and 3 guys were like *fuck man you hit her* haha i told my brothers i got hit in the face and lost a tooth haha. after THAT escapade a crowd surfer kicked me in the eye resulting in my contact popping out. so i had 2 see a half blurry half clear billie, tre and mike. then i got clonked on the head like ....8 times by butt's belonging to crowd surfers. haaah but it was good ahha greenday puts on good concerts. 2 chicks in front of me passed out and i smirked cuz i seen their eyes roll 2 the back of their heads....hahah im going 2 hell. but i thinmk i gotta go 2 sleep now before my brain compresses into my spine.

Realization

Okay, i think i've finally come to a realization over one thing. I'm not over Craig. i know this because of the simple fact that when i see the name craig i get floaty and my heart skips a beat. Whats especially sad is that I've never actually met him before. Although i do recall that i had like several opportunities to meet him but ironically something would happen on the exact day an hour or 2 before/during the meeting time....it makes me sad. Really really sad and I cant help but wonder what would have happened. I know theres like a 50-50 chance that it would have ended even worse off, but that way i wouldn't have to keep thinking about him anymore. just on with my life knowing that he was a real asshole and i'm better off. Now all i can do is make up the excuse and *hope* that he was an asshole which would explain the sudden disappearance. It makes me sad again. its been like 5 months since i last talked to him but even the last conversation seemed awkward. What would have happened if i met you that day? What would have happened if I hadn't had a boyfriend that time? Would you still be here by my side? It sucks not knowing. Craig is my favorite guy that i've liked before (even considering that I haven't met him before) mostly because hes so sweet but brutally honest at the same time....he knows how to make a girl feel good. And it saddens me. I think the real kicker for me that made me like him more than everyone else was that when i was going out with a boyfriend and craig didn't know, he flirted with me and then he asked me if i had a boyfriend (i hate mitch more because of this) and i told him yes cuz if i said no that would be cheating (DAMMIT). so i said yes i had a boyfriend. And i swear i could feel his depression even though were were like 400km's apart. I felt so sad that night, and nothing (even the fact that i had my own boyfriend) seemed to make it go away. And then, like a week later my ass of a beau broke up with me because he didn't htink long distance relationships would work (FUCK THAT SHIT he KNEW i had to leave at the end of the summer so why'd he FUCKING BOTHER) i was like brutally devestated and my brothers and cousin tried to drag my out of my bed and my cousin got me to dry my eyes and come on the computer where she then proceeded to called up Craig (at 3AM) and told him to come online. I dont know if she told him that i needed cheering up or whatnot but he came on line and did just that. At 4AM i stopped crying and was laughing again because he picked up right where he left off and i loved him for that because he made me happy for that hour. And that was the end. Pretty much after that night i never talked to him again....or at least the same Craig anyways. I can't possibly believe that I miss him this much. How can I possibly miss someone that I've never met before. I mean i dont even know his last name, even. It makes me sad because I can't even forget about him, every where i go i see signs with Dr. Craig's or Jenny Craig, or shit like that....my fucking ex's MIDDLE NAME was Craig. how....please somebody tell me HOW TO MAKE IT GO AWAY....(sigh). Could you at least come back online once and leave me a message or something? Tell me your married, Tell me your gay, Tell me something....anything so that i can move on....all i really wanted to know was what could have happened.

Sadness and Sorrow

It sucks being lonely you know. One of these days I hope to go to a psychiatrist and have them diagnose me with some time of accute mental disorder, then hopefully I'll make more sense. Cause seriously sometimes I think way to much for my own good. I think its just the Edmonton air, I never used to think this much in high school....or maybe its just growing up....I hate growing up. When i was 6 i didn't worry about not having a boyfriend, when i was 12 i didn't worry about not having a boyfriend, when i was 17 i didn't really worry about not having a boyfriend. Now that i'm 19 i'm worried about not having a boyfriend. When your single it just seems that the world likes rubbing it in your face, and couples come prancing around in your face holding hands, kissing and eating each others faces like theres no tomorrow. Another thing i hate is memories, iknow iknow i have a lot of good memories with friends....or at least i used to think so....not really anymore, I can't seem to make it a day without thinking of some stupid embarssing situation i've put myself in and when i start to think of something from the past i pinch myself and tell myself to think of something else. Guys leave terrible TERRIBLE impressions on me. I'm starting to think that all guys are assholes. There was only one guy i knew in elementary that i liked and i'm pretty sure that for some godforsaken reason he had liked me too....but....she thought that he was useless and woudln't even think of him as a chance. I'm sorry that I didn't stand up to her, and i really really regret never getting to know you. My life is so full of regrets, that i seriously wonder every single day how it would be different if I had done something different instead. Fate is always a couple days off. What would have happened between me and you if i did come over that night? would you have become more than just a memory, would this hole in my heart be gone....would the sound of your name no longer bring pain and hatred? I dont know, but i really wish you'd come back just for one day, where me and you could sort things out and perhaps bid our final goodbyes properly rather than your abrupt disappearnce from my life. Whats really really sad, i think is that you probably dont even remember me, whereas i had at one time fell for you because you treated me differently than everyone else and saw through my shell....or at least i thought you did. The last few times i spoke with you, you seemed like a completely different person. I guess i hate admiting it and dont think i can, but i dont think you really knew me at all. You're just a player and no matter how hard she defends you thats the word that i associate with you now. i have to forget about you.But at the same time one day, even if its after i die, i'd like to meet you. I'd give you the sad smile that i've developed and I'd tell you what you put me through. Would things have been different if i was prettier....perhaps skinnier? One thing i know, is that the friend that isnt one any more was both and her life? Picture perfect, and if it isn't you're sure putting on a good act. I miss being a kid. One of these days if I go to far I just plan on freaking out and have my family admit me to a mental institute....(even if i do end up faking it but at least i can be myself)

the viscious cycle continues

Look what your terrible backstabbing blog has resulted in me doing. Writing a terrible (not sure if its going to be backstabbing yet) blog about you. Cue flashback, yesterday (read the blog if you must) remember how I told you my friend made me feel like a complete idiot with that whole elbow pipe and *is it the hood stand part* how insulting is that. And not to mention thats totally not the only things she tells me that makes me feel bad. Like when i tell her i can't do soemthing cuz blah blah, shes like *um.... i don't know about you but i can do it just fine* well gee thanks for making me feel totally useless. UGH i'm getting so pissed off again, its like she doens't have the tenacity to think that shes not the only person whos got feelings. Like seriously when i read that very very first entry about me I got super sad and worried and was like man now what, its gonna be so awkward. but i guess i just pretended like i didn't read it and everyting was okay, i just tried to be more like...i dunno careful with my words. BUT SERIOUSLY how am i supposed to be fucking careful when you *basically* tell me that i'm a bimbo. I seriously dont think you think about your words and how much of a hypocrite you are. If i hurt your feelings with harsh words i'm sorry, but it certainly doens't give you the right to make me feel like an invalid. And I think the MAIN reason why this caused a big kuffufin was because I found the blog in the first place. I would CERTAINLY HOPE that if your gonna write bad blogs about one of your best friends that you yourself said had once considered family, it SHOULD NOT be a direct link on your main homepage that is posted on your msn profile that everyone has access too. I know this blog of mine really isnt' any better but at least its not easily accessible unless you have really good luck surfing blogs or i friggen give you the link. Ugh, i have such a terrible life i think sometimes. Like basically my 2 very best high school friends who i've known for 12 and 9 years, make me feel useless half the time. Such a bad relationship. but well yeah i'm ging to go now, and eat or something cuz all that crying and punching walls (weakly as *someone* tells me) has made me really nungry.

some one just shoot me

ug, tis been a super super long time...like 2 weeks...hahaha. my god today was a terribly looooong day. i went in to work 2 hours early to let the other hostess take the rest of the day off to study (which i also had to do also) and i get off at 10 (supposed to) and every single saturday, right at 10'oclock (never ceases to fail) i get bombarded w/ a million take outs and never end up leaving till like 10 30-10 45. Whats even worse is I ring it under the other girl's name cuz i figure i'll leave before they come....nope...wrong. and those last few tables always give a tip... boo hoo.. haha but its okay my waitress gives me the tip anyways cuz i end up packing it and getting soup...hoho...well okay that was work. i got home at like 10 45 and my tbone aunt has called and left like 3 messages telling me or my brother to go and pick up some rice and leftovers. n i was like *but but...its like 11 and its late and i dont have a car anymore* and she was like *hmmm....hmmmm.....hmmmmmmm....i know, send your brother over, tell him to take the bus* n i was like...*but...but* so i got suckered in, and then i was like (lightbulb) i know we'll take the spare emergency car keys and take the car and stop a block away from her place and then walk 2 get the food, cuz hell I aint waiting who knows how long for a bus to come at 12AM on a saturday night. so we got the key and went 2 start up the car....BUT IT WOULDN'T START n i was like....omg oh myyy god not my car brothers gonna kill me. so we sat in the car a bit and tried to see if we left any lights on or anything, but everything was off. so i was like shit man wtf. arg so i called AMA and they were like we'll be there in ~90 minutes. so i was like okay thanx.....DAMNIT THE FOOD. so i like brain hemmoraged cuz i thought so hard. i gave AMA my cell number so they'd call b4 they got here so i was debating who should keep the phone. but in the end i gave it to my brother who went to take the bus and get the food so he could call and stuff if anything happened and he could call the house phone when AMA finally called. so i swear that 90 minutes was like the longest time of my life. my brother called like 4 times to check what bus to take, got the food, coming home now. and FINALLY the AMA guy called and i waited downstairs for like 10 mintues....nada. so i came back up stairs to call brother and see and still ntohing. Finally i see the flashing yellow lights....long story short, the man fixed the car...big sigh of relief. What was really weird (and scary) was that the car was like....not as we remember leaving it. first of all the car tarp was off (and in the trunk), battery was dead (duh main story here but how is the question) and finally, when i popped the hood for the guy this like...arm sized elbow shaped black plastic pipe was like....lying underneath the hood right in the middle on top of the engine. and the guy like picked it up and looked at me weird, n i was like...uh...i dunno not mine....so weird....but yeah that was the end. oh no wait one more thing. so after the big kuffufin was over i told my friend what happened and about that elbow pipe thing, and the first thing she said was *was it the hood stand*. n i was like already pissed off and when i seen that i like almost punched the screen. COME ON i'm not fricken stupid here, i mean i'm not an automotives person but i can tell what the stand looks like. GAWD.... i mean seriously, sometimes i wonder. This is the same friend that had that wrote that blog about me saying how sometimes my words to her were harsh and stuff. How much of a hypocrite are you if you do the same to me. Seriously sometimes the questions and answers she gives me are a serious insult to my intelligence. Yes i know i'm a bimbo sometimes but thats when I act like it. guh.... so angry....and hot...and tired...and head achey....vreh....oh and btw my food was cold.... oh one more thing, after i finally settled down it finally dawned on me how much it seems like i've grown up. Like i feel really immature sometimes and scared to do things on my own, but I think maybe today I proved to myself that I can take charge and take care of things. Cuz like in the car, i didn't even really stop to think i just popped open the glove compartment and called AMA. and i thought a pretty smart response to the big cell phone dilemna and it was a good call. and ....so yeah hahah i'm really proud of myself today cuz i handled it pretty well...haha yay.....this calls for a cookie...mmmm

ARG FUCK ME

AAAARGH, SERIOUSLY WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE THESE DAYS. My god. Come on world, how come you gotta be so mean to me. First off all my *long weekends* are fucking useless ESPECIALLY if i gotta work them all. Damn you fucking Goldie, took all the days off and gave me all her shifts till she gets mother fucking back from her nice holiday. I can't even fucking go shopping for fucks sake cuz i got THE shittiest shifts ever. ARG. AND THEN my mofo stupid DICK SHIT of a brother starts like flipping out on me....well ACTUALLY he was flipping on out my older brother who's out here in edmonton with me. Basically calling him useless and a mooch. n he was complaining that we use his car too much and that we take it on joy rides. FOR THE LOVE OF FUCKING GOD i'm fucking sorry if we need food to live and if that is an inconvenience to you. So then he tells me that its not fair taht he has to pay for tune ups and insurance and all that crap. n i'm like FUCK YOU ASSHOLE man its your OWN fault for leaving the car out here and you staying up in fort mac molting. You could come back if you wanted to but nooo stay it is. and BULLSHIT on that whole paying the insurance part, i mean you paid for it either way. If we didn't drive your fucking car it'd be out here doing fuck shit anyways. So he wants us to send him up his car keys, which is fine by me because i've managed on my own w/o a car this long i'm sure i can again. A car is a luxury sure, and its nice to have around but i dont fucking need it. call me an asshole i seriously dont give 2 shits right now. But 2 can play this game. Personally i'd consider myself to be the most favored child of us 3, mostly cuz i'm the youngest, the only girl (evil snicker) the *happiest* and maybe the most independant. So my parents probably secretly worry about me the most and when i have a problem they really worry. So being out here *on my own* must give them nightmares. But they breath a sigh of relief knowing that i have a nice reliable car to help me travel halfway across town to retrieve our weekly rations (which i also pay for). I'd love to see the glares they give Terence (who is living w/ them btw) when i send them the keys back w/ a nice loving note saying *Terence's car keys, because he doesn't want us to drive his car anymore* Thats waht you get for being such a greedy bastard. Send your hate mail I dont care. If i was up in rich city making shit loads of money I wouldn't care if my brothers drove my car around once a week to get food. Seriously if he honestly wants to leave fort mcmurray i dont see why he doesn't. I know the restaurant is having some ridiculously stupid family bickerings but if he left, i'm sure they'd friggen force those stupid differences aside and make up. If not just close the damn restaurant down, from what i hear everyones sick and tired of it anyways. My rant for the day, sincerely Corinna-pissed off-Chow