My heart misses you

My heart misses you so much and I don't know what to do.
I just want to call you and tell you I miss you and find out what happened that made you not want me anymore. I just want to hear you say you miss me too. I don't want to get over you and I don't want to see anybody else. You were so capable of making me happy that I never saw this break-up coming. Why wouldn't you tell me when that you weren't happy? All I can think about now is things that I could've done to make this outcome different. I want to go out and party with you, I want to go out and drink with you, I would love to go to Vegas, play video games or anything. I don't want you to think that I didn't want to do any of these things and that I was boring. I just wanted to do them WITH you, not with you off to the side watching, or at a wedding, or another party. I wanted to do so much with you, and it breaks my heart that you don't want to do any of those. I don't want to get married, and I've never thought about getting married. I just enjoy spending time NOW with you and the immediate. I never thought about being with you 20 years from now, but I thought it was at least possible. My heart hurts so much not knowing what made you see  me differently so suddenly. You tried so so hard to make me fall for you and it hurts so much that it worked only to have you pull that picture out from underneath me. I miss you so much Dave and the sweet things you've done for me. I wish you would have told me something so that I knew you were unhappy, instead of pretending you were okay, and letting me think everything was okay. If you were so unhappy why did you ask me to come camping with you, why ask me to come to your parent's anniversary dinner, why sleep in the same bed with me and hold me close at night. It gave me such a false sense of security and hope. I can't stop remembering all the things you did that made me feel loved, that made me feel like you genuinely wanted me. I just want to try so much harder to try and make this work, but I dont know if its even possible. I just want to know that you will be in my life, and it hurts so much to think that you won't be anymore.