Hi.
I'm trying to snap out of this severe loneliness I feel right now, and I guess one of the first things I'm supposed to do is figure out the things that remind me of Dave to think and do something else so that memory doesn't linger. Let's hope tis works:
Facebook. is my main source of spying on Dave without him knowing. I'll look through his pictures, and see how he is doing.
How do I stop. Close the browser right away. Go on Ebay, kijiji, something else.
Old archived messages between Dave and I. I keep on going back to our old conversations and reading how happy we were back then, and wondering what happened.
How do I stop. I need to delete them. I'm having trouble deleting them because a small part in my mind thinks we will get back together. I need to stop looking back to the past. Its over, and nothing can change that.
Thinking about the happiest times I had with Dave. These are the reminders that make me feel like we were meant for each other.
How do I stop. Clap your hands. No joke. It startles me and jolts me back to reality.
Overthinking when Dave is out having fun. I worry that Dave is bashing me behind my back, telling everyone how horrible of a girlfriend I was.
How do I stop. Realize I was a great girlfriend. It was Dave who gave up on me, I couldn't fix something that I had no idea was broken. I made dinners, lunches, snacks, visited him at work, thought of things he would like. He never did that for me.
Inability to snap out of a slump. The hardest thing right now because I am constantly missing Dave.
How do I stop. Call Iris. Jessica. Nomin. Ling. Tara. Jamie.
Wondering if Dave misses me and what he did with the items I left at his house. I keep hoping that Dave will realize he made a mistake and want to get back together after something reminds him of me.
How do I stop. Realize Dave doesn't miss you. If he did we wouldn't have broken up.
The idea that Dave was perfect for me. He was nice, always opened my door and did everything I asked.
How do I stop. Realize Dave wasn't perfect. And I knew this. He never learned from his mistakes, he did avoid problems until they left him alone, he procrastinated worse than I did, he was bad with his money and always bought things he didn't need, his house terrified me, his bathroom terrified me even more, he never thought things thoroughly, he always talked about losing weight but didn't really do anything about it, he always talked about how Amway was giong to change his life but never did anything to prove it, he never had a plan for the future that was believable, he worked too much and will never become successfull until he realizes he needs to focus on one job, he never used his c-pap machine even though the doctor told him he could die in his sleep, he may have kept dating me the last 2 months just for sex, he couldn't save money if his life depended on it, he started smoking and gambling again, he never did thoughtful things for me, he never was there for me when i needed him emotionally, he never really understood me or knew me, or tried to get to know me, and he got me a bullet blender for valentines day !!!
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