A different kind of sadness

Does anyone else ever feel really really sad after they finish reading a really good book?
Sad because the story ends?
Even if it is a happy ending?

When I was still in University, ever year during exam week as a study break I would start reading the entire Sailor Moon manga series. And every year, after I finished reading the last page of the last book I would always feel a bit sad. Because such a great story came to an end. Maybe I feel this way because I'm such a pessimist..... but it always made me sad because it was like saying good bye to someone you watched grow up and knowing that you'll never see them again. You can always read the book, or watch the movie, or play the game all over again, but then nobody knows anyone again. It's not a new adventure or memory.....
Ha-ha, I sound super dramatic I know. But I always always thought this. Chrono Trigger is another game that always makes me sad when I finish it. Especially the ending where everyone goes back to their time periods and the Gates permanently close. They  met each other at the beginning, grew and became friends and had an amazing adventure, and then they all had to say good bye and never see each other again. So sad ! I much rather prefer the ending where they still have Epoch and can visit everyone whenever they want. (Yes, even if it means accidentally fucking up the past !)

So this leads to my next favorite story. The Fast and the Furious movies ! I know there is a new movie coming out soon, but all honestly, I kind of wish they stopped it after Fast Five. I guess I won't know until the 6th movie comes out.... BUT WHAT IF THEY RUIN IT !!! Fast Five had a very very nice ending. Albeit it made me sad. :( Not too sure why. But I woke up this morning with that same feeling I get when I finish reading Sailor Moon. Even though it was a very good ending, and everyone was rich and able to do their own thing now. I think it made me sad because it felt like their adventure was over. How bittersweet. Even though it makes me sad, I wouldn't change a thing about it. If I did, then it wouldn't be a 'perfect ending' anymore ! But yeah, all the movies with Vin Diesel and Paul Walker in them, they were always doting on the idea of family and they spent all this time together planning jobs and heists. Or was it the opposite and  maybe they did all those jobs just so they could spend time together..... Maybe thats it. After the happy endings, the main problem is solved and the friends don't have a real reason to spend time together and go on an adventure..... Ai-ya, why am I thinking so deeply about this !

Maybe that's what adjustment disorder does. Makes it hard for me to accept that a story is over :( That the happiest times are over, and that there's no more adventures after.... Even though real life isn't like that, because my story doesn't end after a good day. It goes on and on with more and more stories and happier and sadder times. It is wrong to live in the past isn't it. While dating Dave, one of the happiest memories I can remember is the night we all went out to Halo. My friends. Dave's friends. And even Brendan. And then we went to All Happy, and I was sitting at the head of the table, and I looked around and saw everyone getting along and smiling and laughing. And I put my head on Dave's shoulder and thought. This is a great memory. And I always think back to that day and it feels like I'll never be that happy again. Even though I know this is a lie. I can find that happiness again if I want to. But I have to look for it in the present. Not by reliving the past that doesn't exist anymore. Its funny how I can give great advice to people, but I don't know how to take it myself. And everything always comes back to you. I think I'm almost okay now. Haven't talked to you in a month. And haven't seen you in almost two. I wonder if you think about me, and I hope that you do. And I wish every day that I'd see a message from you. But I don't know what I'd do if any of those things came true. Those wishes are what my heart wants very very bad. But as I've learnt, the heart isn't always the best judge of character. This relationship and heart break probably happened for a reason. And as much as I want us to be together again.......you weren't meant for me and I just need to know that there are better things waiting out there for me that can make me even happier.